When I became Nigel - the British guy with the bad accent!

I am pretty sure that when I was in College the Olympics were held in London.  Also at this time I was the President of our dorm counsel.  It turned out that the night of our meeting, was also the night of the ladies long program for ice skating.  There was NO WAY I was going to miss this night of skating.  We met in one of the big common spaces in the dorm.  I went up early and set up my portable TV so I could have it on and keep my eye on the screen during the meeting.  For some reason - and who knows what that reason was - I began speaking with a British accent and started calling myself Nigel.  The members of the counsel thought this was hilarious.  The secretary, Marsha, was awesome in writing the minutes.  Her minutes for this meeting was no exception.  Naturally when the skaters came on, the meeting stopped in its tracks.  The meeting would continue during the commercials.  Most of the members were not annoyed with me, but rather completely amused at my accent and my commitment to watching figure skating.  In the end, we managed to get our work done for the counsel planning activities and I got to watch my skating and teach my friends about skating.  As a side note - in my 30's a skating rink opened near my house.  Eventually I decided that I was going to take lessons to see if I did have the potential to be a figure skater, something I was told in my youth.  Turns out - I did - and though there are some regrets about not following that passion,  I know that there was no way  my parents could have afforded lessons and competition for me.  I did learn that for as easy as the skaters make it look, it is NOT.  Catching a blade, knocking yourself off balance, crumbling to the ice, sliding quite quickly on your back and butt into the boards at full speed is NOT fun.  I tip my hat to all figures skaters because that is one hard sport!!!!!

People, People Who Need People are the Luckiest People in the World

Part of the problem I am having now is not feeling comfortable around people.  If you know me that is not usually a problem for me.  This happened about 13-14 years ago.  It kept me from going into shopping malls and any place where I was inside and there were a lot of people. This time it is not quite so bad, though I still struggle with this a bit.  It was funny that yesterday, I felt that way a little, but because I was having trouble walking on the uneven surfaces and the distances - I did not have time to focus on that because I was concentrating on not falling.  I went to a tailgate - which was fun and everyone was really nice, yet I still found myself feeling like I needed to get lost in a wall somewhere.  Once I got into the stadium, I did not think much about all the people and just concentrated on the game.  It is funny because after a day like yesterday, and I suppose this has to do with spending the day with Anthony, I feel kind of lost and lonely because there is no one around.  It seems odd that my anxiety and panic kicks up in only certain situations.  I also think it is odd that I don't want to be around people and yet after I force myself to do that I feel better, but afterward the loneliness is worse.  Yes I have a dog and a cat and I love them to death, but they can't talk to me.  I can talk to them, and do, but they do not answer back except with their eyes, tales, and ability to cuddle.  I know there are others who deal with the same feelings, and that helps to know.  I just don't know where this came from.  I have not been like this for about 13 years - I feel like I've lost my mojo - and that is not a good feeling.